Choice Ramblings

When I was about six years old, both of my sisters got chicken pox. I remember it well because it made me quite upset. Why didn’t I get to have chicken pox?

My foolproof plan? I decided to help them scratch their itchy spots. I also happily volunteered to sleep in their beds with them. But all of my scheming came to nothing in the end. I didn’t get chicken pox, and to this day, I still haven’t had them.

Years later, at age 13, my beautiful older sister started modelling. I wasn’t able to go to New York or L.A. with her. And even though I tried to be the best weasel that there ever was, I was still unable to weasel my way onto the airplane with her to Japan.

Last year, my younger sister embarked upon an epic adventure all across Europe. And success!! *fist pumps the air* I was able to fandangle my way into her trip. I met up with her in Greece, and we had a whole whirlwind adventure of our own. Let me tell you – getting groped by a 50 year old married man who barely speaks any English, is definitely a scenario in which you want to have your sister close at hand for.

So is that it? Have I dealt with my need to be included? Have I figured it out?

Hah. Not likely. But I have discovered that it all comes down to choices. I can choose to let it bother me – being left out of things – or I can choose to let it go.

Every day is made up of choices. We are able to choose to be more positive, less selfish, and more approachable. We can choose to let go of our misguided childhood beliefs, and choose to be realistic with ourselves and accept where we are at.

A very wise and Princely fellow recently reminded me that we are the ones who choose where our lives take us. There are multiple sides to each one of us, and we ultimately make choices everyday which determine our behaviour and our attitude.

Right now? I’m choosing to procrastinate packing the boxes in my bedroom. It’s not making me feel very good – even though I am enjoying this writing – and yet, here I am, typing away.

Anyways, my point is this: Our lives are a result of the choices we make – and even of the choices we don’t make. So just remember that the next time you’re in a difficult situation. You can choose to be who you want to be.

Who do I want to be? I want to be a character in a new Harry Potter/Lord of the Rings/James Bond Book Series. Wow. What an epic tale that would be, huh?! Don’t worry mom – I’m only half serious.


Don’t Do it Unless Something Leaps Inside of you

I wonder what the world would look like if we all lived up to our true potential. If we stopped putting ourselves down, stopped acting certain ways to be liked, stopped changing who we are for those around us.

In my head, I’m imagining all of my best friends as a combination of rockstar/superhero’s – everyone loves wearing costumes, right? I’m imagining that truth would be an easy thing – that we would be honest with ourselves and with others.

I encountered someone recently who’s memory I can’t quite shake. There was something there, in the quiet soulful looks. Something in their acceptance of care and of comfort. It was as if I saw someone who hadn’t yet seen themself.

My heart ache’s with “if only’s” now. If only they knew what they could be. If only they could see what I see. If only… If only their eyes weren’t soulfully pleading with me in my memory.

People will see you the way they want to see you, but you’re more talented then you give yourself credit for. You’re kinder than you think, and stronger than you feel, and more caring than you’d ever admit. So don’t cover it up. Don’t hide yourself or dumb yourself down. Don’t buy in to the pressures of society.

Don’t even listen to the ramblings of some girl on the internet, unless it leaves you feeling fulfilled. Don’t do it unless something leaps inside of you.

I used to be that girl that silently allowed the world to change me. Now I’m all about the leaping. And the costumes.
And now I’m imagining myself in a frog costume… bouncing up and down like a nutter, not caring one bit.

Zombie Bait, Lover of Cats, and my Sandwich Dance Partner

*Cue Micheal Jackson’s “PYT – Pretty Young Thing”*

There’s this girl I know. I’d say she’s firey. Long luscious hair, bright smile, legs for days. *Note to self: this is not a love story*

Right, well, anyways… this girl I know? She’s pretty much my hero. Her name is Sam Girard.

The dictionary defines a hero as being “someone who is of distinguished courage or ability, admired for his/her brave deeds and noble qualities.” So do I picture Sam as some sort of Xena warrior princess, who is known for her distinguished courage and brave deeds? Well, no. Not exactly. I see Sam as more of a Jocelyn figure (from A Knight’s Tale) – a sassy, grounded, playful woman, who laughs at herself and dances like a flame.

Sam is my hero for two reasons. One – I genuinely admire her passion for life. And two – she reminds me to let go and laugh at myself.

If life was a dance party, I would want Sam to be my dim-witted older brother so that we could sandwich dance a stranger together– A Night at the Roxbury.

If life was all about cats, I’d want Sam to be riding shotgun in my car. No I’m serious. She’s totally in love with her cat. I would want her cat-like expertise if the world was over-run with cats.

If life was a post-apocalyptic zombie thriller, I would want Sam to be the prime rib of my travelling buffet. (Zombie Land Rule for Living #6: Travel in a Group: The best way to increase your odds of survival when travelling in a zombie outbreak is to make sure you’re a traveling buffet. Going it alone gives the zombies no choices but to eat you. Going it with the old man with the limp, the little kid who cant run and the middle aged woman with the plastic leg gives the zombies more options and you better odds you can run away faster than they can.)

Thank you Sam – for helping me to appreciate life. For real.

Aaaand back to dancing.

An Elephant Love Song, Beatles Classic, and E. E. Cummings Medley

Today’s writing challenge (to steal and borrow from others) opens with Satine (Nicole Kidman) and Christian (Ewan McGregor), on top of an elaborately decorated and bejeweled brass elephant, singing an Elephant Love Song Medley to eachother.

“Love is like oxygen. Love is a many, splendored thing. Love lifts you up where you belong. All you need is love.”
“Please, don’t start that again.”

Segway into a Beatles classic –

All you need is love.” Bwa wa wa wa waaahh “All you need is love.” Bwa wa wa wa waaahh “All you need is love, love. Love is all you need.”

Pause retro dance party for another Segway into an E. E. Cummings poetic masterpiece

“Here is the deepest secret nobody knows. Here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows higher than soul can hope or mind can hide. And this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart – I carry your heart. I carry it in my heart.”

Without ever really having focused on this before, I’m realizing now that there is a lot of emphasis on “love” in our lives. It makes sense to a certain degree – we naturally seek affirmation, acceptance and care in our lives (forms of love).

Sometimes, however, I think that our society over-uses the concept of love, and ends up creating unrealistic expectations in our minds if we let it. I mean, I just watched a De Beers Diamond commercial where the message on love is about giving a woman jewelry instead of verbally affirming her of love. It doesn’t tell us what love is. All it does is show us that at recognized life events (Christmas), a man is obligated to “say I love you” without words, but with jewelry.

The way I see it, love is different for everyone. Love changes and grows. Love fades. Love burns and nurtures.

Final Segway into my favorite quote on love –

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud, it is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres.

End scene.